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Blogs > Petite4's blogs > I FEEL SO ACCEPTED FOR ME ON BBW
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I FEEL SO ACCEPTED FOR ME ON BBW Sort by:
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Petite4
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posted on 14-NOV-08


total posts: 14




You know, I joined BBW because my whole life I had been fat and men always ran after the twigs. I've always felt like an "other". Like there are those who belong and those who don't. Even after I lost weight, I still gravitated towards BBW. I like this dating site because I am accepted for who I am, that means if I gain back the 90 pounds I lost, I would still be liked for me! I'd love to hear from others as to why they joined BBW as opposed to regular dating sites.



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steelmant Preferred member
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commented on 26-NOV-08


total posts: 44




online/chatting now

- Show quoted text -

Thank you. It took me a long while to realize this, as did the audience. But soon, they realize that no matter what the size or otherwise, when an artist/musician steps onto the stage, puts their heart and soul into a show, just for them, they soon realize that there is more to life that they see. A great example of this is Meat Loaf. He's a larger that life person too, but he can still rock the world and move the soul with his songs.



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one2one Preferred member
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commented on 25-NOV-08


total posts: 111





"To me, personally, if the audience judges a musician on looks alone, they're not an audience. A true audience will receive a musician/artist for their talents, not their looks."

... This was really well put! :)



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Petite4
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commented on 25-NOV-08


total posts: 14




- Show quoted text -

Thanks for sharing such a heartfelt story.



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steelmant Preferred member
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commented on 25-NOV-08


total posts: 44




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I live in Virginia in a small town about an hour south of Winchester. When I was on stage, the audience soon realized never judge a book by it's cover. Then the 2 best shockers happened. One night this 1 young lady actually bought ME drinks after singing Mustang Sally. I was so flattered. Then the 2nd was at a neat-o little club, I came off stage playing the guitar to Shaky Ground and started dancing and playing at the same time. After a few failed attempts with a few girls, Ifelt these shoulders against mine. I layed my head back onto the shoulder of the best looking woman in the place. She turned around, and got so close to me dancin' that I felt every curve of her better that the curves of my guitar!! Do you know how hard it is to have the most gorgeous woman in the place snuggled into you so tight that it feels so right, and be playing and dancing to a song as funky as Shaky Ground all at the same time? It was GREAT and I did it!! And also like a gentleman, after the song, I gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek and a big "thank you for the dance" whispered into her ear. Then another hug later after the show was over. To me, personally, if the audience judges a musician on looks alone, they're not an audience. A true audience will receive a musician/artist for their talents, not their looks.



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butterbll
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commented on 23-NOV-08


total posts: 447





Actualy the log in name I go by is Butterball. But this site would not allow number of letters I needed so I had to shortnen it.



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Petite4
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commented on 22-NOV-08


total posts: 14




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Wow Bill, thank you for your powerful story. The only thing is, I've seen many people in my support group weighing anywhere from 200 pounds to 400 pounds and they have all followed this food plan that I'm on and have lost well over 100 pounds in a very short period of time. And we eat normal food. My brother is an excellent example. He was 400 pounds this exact time last year, he is now around 250 you must go to my website and look at his before and after pictures. You really don't need gastric bypass there is a way of eating normal foods that will take the weight off like lightning and is healthy.



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butterbll
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commented on 22-NOV-08


total posts: 447





Congratulations Petite4 on your weight loss. I have to say that you look great!!Petite4 and
caughtoffguard I know exactly what your are talking about.In high school (many years ago ) I was large. I got the same type of treatment from a lot of folks in school. All the girls wanted the "RICH" guys with the"Perfect body."Less than 2% body fat and the golden tan and the perfect hair and teeth and the like. I was not in that group. Fast forward 10 years and due to unhealthy eating habits. I had packed on almost 150 pounds.
I now know that I am a stress eater. My favorite things were fried foods, 3 Liter sodas,Iced tea with a 1/2 inch haze of sugar in the big 60 Oz. glass I used. Fast forward
another 10 years stress of working three jobs, finical stress from my wife's excessive spending habits,1 bad marriage, and Later divorce later.I was a 100 pounds heavier. I topped the scales at over 450 at my heaviest . Now with almost totally(99.999%) eliminating it, and exercise I have lost 35-40 pounds and with my Lap band I have lost a another 35-40 pounds in about a years time. My goal is to be healthier.I know that I will never be 180 pounds or lighter, but I know that I will be better able to move at 225 pounds than 450 pounds.caughtoffguard as for having the Gastric bypass I would think very hard about it.It is used normally for severe morbid obesity.No offense I don't think you fit the bill.At worst you are under a 25- 50 under you "Ideal" weight finding out what your BMI is the best to figure out what needs to be done. through Diet modification , and increasing you physical activity you could lose that in about a years time. The Gastric by pass PERMANENTLY modifies the way you eat. It also can cause nutritional problems, Bowel problems. Yet you can still put on weight, by eating high calorie foods.caughtoffguard , or Any one else I am not trying to flame you about thinking about the Gastric Bypass surgery.Please just do your research carefully and be informed of your options. Because surgery should be used as a Tool to help you lose , not the easy "magical fix all! You will Have to do some "Sweat Equity" to get the slimmer you.



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Petite4
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commented on 22-NOV-08


total posts: 14




- Show quoted text -

Cool. Where do you live? How do your audiences receive you?



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steelmant Preferred member
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commented on 22-NOV-08


total posts: 44




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I've played in 2 different country/souther rock bands for a total of 5 years of better. I was the showman, and hope to soon be in another rockin' band soon. But for now, just waiting patiently. :-) I've sang and played just about anything from George Jones "The Grand TOur" to Eric Clapton "Cocaine" and all points in between.



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Petite4
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 14




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Hi caughtoffguard, I hope you don't mind my saying so, but i hope you don't go through with the surgery. Of course you know what's best for you, I just think that there are alternatives that are healthier and long lasting and safe.



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Petite4
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 14




Thank you. If nothing else, it's a great place to have honest communication with other like minded individuals. Not having to make excuses for who and what size we are.



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Petite4
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 14




Oh lord, it's like someone saying "Oh you have such a pretty face..." then the conversation trails off and you know they want to say too bad you're fat. People are dumb or socially challenged. lol



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Petite4
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 14




- Show quoted text -

Oh.. thanks for the quote button info.. lol... Yes, thank you. The weight loss is a huge accomplishment and I just do it one day at a time and make it a lifestyle as opposed to a diet... you know, something you go on and off...lol. I make exercise a lifestyle change. Otherwise, I'd go nuts with all of the messages society gives us.



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one2one Preferred member
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 111





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Caught ... can I share something with you that I hope will help you with you decision to have surgery?

You are beautiful. Right now. exactly as you are. You're not fat, you're a woman, and not all women are a size 2. Some are more goddess-like.

20 years ago (right about where you're at now) I was a GODDESS. I mean it. I was gorgeous and curvy and sexy as hell. I was a size 16/18, about 170 lbs. and it looked GOOD on me ... an hour glass that Marylin Monroe would have envied.

And I had no idea. I missed the whole thing. I couldn't see myself as I actually was but only through the filter that certain other people (including in my own family) looked through when they saw me.

Part of me knew they were wrong, but that part was overruled by too many other 'opinions' floating around in my mind.

I thought I was fat. It took me 20 years, finding old photos of that point in my life and a lot more weight to understand that I was an idiot to listen to all the stupid prejudice that exists.

Go look again. You're beautiful ... right now ... and if I'm not mistaken there a part of you that knows it. Listen to her, please.



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truefriendinme
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 551





Petite4--
Congratulations on your weight loss! You look wonderful! Kudos to you and your efforts. Good luck in maintaining, I am sure you will be successful! --True

FYI make sure you click the "quote" button to reply directly to a person's comment. We don't know who exactly you're talking to!



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truefriendinme
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 551





Caught off guard...email me (I'm not a member) about this Gastric Bypass option. I have not had the surgery. But I DO work in a Digestive Disease Unit at a major medical center here in the South East. This is NOT an option that an otherwise healthy, young adult should consider. This surgery is NOT an "end all" to obesity. It really is a last resort option for those who have REALLY tried all other options, and cannot lose. In addition, most people choosing this option have serious co-morbidities that may make the surgery a necessity, such as Diabetes and Hypertension, among many, many others. It is a very, very serious lifestyle change with so many risks involved. PLEASE do lots of research before considering this further. Petite4 has the right idea about weight loss. Diet and exercise are the best options for permanent, non-life threatening weightloss. Remember, diet is NOT a "four-letter-word". It is a choice we make every day. It's a lifestyle. A diet should never be considered "temporary". It is a way of life. I could not stand by and NOT reply to you... --True



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nodramaaroundme
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 285





- Show quoted text -

Yes I'm on some "normal" dating sites and some interracial sites as well. I seem to get more attention on them. And when I say more I mean a few winks more and attempts to email...just a few.

I rarely get any attention on this site but I LOVE the blogs. But OZ is right, I usually tell them I'm plus size and then the conversation changes to which famous big person I'm the size of so they can get some idea.



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playabigd
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commented on 18-NOV-08


total posts: 3





i joined to see if people feel like i do and i see they do.you seem real cool goodluck to you and me on this site.



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Petite4
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commented on 17-NOV-08


total posts: 14




Thank you. Yes, the weight loss has been a wonderful journey. But I had to remember, going from a size 22 to a size 1-2 is mind boggling, not to mention feeling fabulous that I can go into any shop to buy cute clothes, but I had to remember, I am not a number on a scale, nor am I a clothes size. I am a total human being! Beautiful inside and out regardless of my weight.

Wow! And you know what? You are totally gorgeous!! I love your red hair. Yes, I found myself lying about my stats on regular dating sites because they would reject me otherwise but then, what good would lying do because once I met them, they knew I was lying! catch 22



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